Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Christmas Holidays Packed A Punch This Year

The flu has been using me like a hacky sack. It started at 6:15am on Christmas morn. Not with me, mind you, but with the Oldest Urchin. I made it to the bathroom just in time to hold her hair back.

Sigh. She was rather pathetic. By 6:30 she was lamenting, "Why did this have to happen on a national holiday? Why not an ordinary day?!?" She's nothing if not a dramatic nine year old.

The Man and I had laid down the law on Christmas Eve. No Urchin was allowed to get out of bed before 7am. So true to form, I tucked the Oldest Urchin into the guest futon with me, and she bounced back with abnormal speed.

O.U. - "Twelve minutes until Christmas starts, Mom." "Eight minutes."
Only seven minutes left, Mommy."

Me - "Close your eyes. And quit talking to me with puke breath."

O.U. (seriously unfazed) *crazy kid whisper only achievable on Christmas morning* "Five minutes left!"

Me- "How do you know there's only five minutes if your eyes are closed?"

O.U. "Ummm" *devious silence* "Santa told me?"

So package ripping commenced at 7:01 am and ended at approximately 7:03. Round two of flu vomiting began a little after 9. Then around 11, I got hit.

I'd finally been well enough to get a flu shot on Dec. 23rd. Okay, it probably didn't take hold until a few days later, so I was able to hold off most of my disgruntledness in the name of accurate science. But then I got hit again with the flu on the 28th and 29th! WTH flu shot? C'MON!!!

The only upside is that I lost 5 pounds over the holidays.  Soon to be put back right where they were with the upcoming devouring of the last of the Christmas cookies that have been calling to me all day.

So I'm barely back in the saddle, and I have to report to the new year's eve drop in about an hour.  I hope your holidays treated you a little better, and that Santa was very good to you.

Have a happy new year!

Monday, December 23, 2013

Kid's Christmas Special Personality Test

Okay. My father in law is out of the hospital and slowly recuperating at home, and I'm finally over the flu. So, you know what that means. Time for some off-the-wall-pent-up-crazy from me.

Which leads to today's post. I've been ruminating on what a person's preferences for children's Christmas special moments says about his or her's personality. I know there are quick personality tests based on your favorite Stooge (Mine's Larry), your favorite Marx Brother (when I was young it was Harpo, now it's Groucho), and your favorite Power Ranger (I have no idea. I didn't watch them, but my favorite Ninja Turtle is Rafael, just for the record.).

So let's do a run down of kid's Christmas specials, shall we?

Frosty the Snowman.

The only part of Frosty the Snowman that I actually like is when one of the kids in the beginning tries to name him Oatmeal.



I share Sheldon's opinion of Frosty.



But I don't agree with him on The Grinch. There are so many parts to the Grinch that I love that I devoted an entire post to the top three best Grinch moments one year. I've only been able to narrow it down to two for this year.

The moment when the Grinch gets his awful idea and smiles that wonderfully devious smile.



I need a tee shirt with that smile on it.

Neck and neck with that moment is when the Grinch returns to Who-ville with the presents and the Whovians open like a gate for him. I have no explanation for why I love that moment like I do. Just accept it and move on please.



The moment of which I speak is at 3:25.

On to A Wish For Wings That Work. Now I'm a HUGE Bloom County fan from way back. At first I wasn't sure about giving a voice to Opus for this movie, but the whole kaboodle is just awesome. And again we have a tie. My favorite parts of this classic are the Elvis cameos and when Opus says, in regard to Bill the Cat wanting to be his best buddy, "but stinkbugs would like to dance the Watusi in my undershorts. I mean, you gotta draw the line somewhere." For some strange reason there are no clips of these parts on YouTube. I can't understand why.

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

My favorite part of that special is when Herbie declares his desired profession.



Followed closely by Yukon Cornelius trying to ascertain if he's found gold by licking his pickaxe. Because, really, what person on the Rankin/Bass team thought up that little gem?



So that's going to do it for tonight. We'll see if I find the time to continue these crazy ramblings for a  part two. (Because I haven't even touched on The Year Without A Santa Clause yet) But what I really want to know is, what are your favorite parts from any of the great children's Christmas special classics? Lay it on me in the comments!

And have a beautiful Christmas!

Friday, December 13, 2013

Excuses, Excuses

This is a hectic time of year for all of us, I know. So my excuses for being away from my home away from home, Tongue In Cheek, and not out visiting all of your awesome blogs right now don't hold that much water. And since I try to make TiC a zany kind of place, I don't get serious here very often.

BUT. . .

Along with all the regular holiday craziness that comes with two young Urchins, I also have other more pressing excuses.

Like my father-in-law has been having heart trouble all fall, and it has gotten shoved into the semi-serious, and I'm the closest relative with the most flexibility in my schedule since I only teach the crazy three year olds half days. So much of my time has been spent helping out The Man's mom.

Going back to work this year since staying home with my kiddos is wreaking havoc on my immune system. So I've been constantly sick, picking up all sundry of germs from those nutsy three year olds.

I'm tying up all the mounds of paperwork and jobs that go along with passing the torch of presidency to the next president of my local writer's group. The list of items seems ENDLESS!!!

Plus the wacky New Year's Eve Drop. Plus the three chapter critique I offered a member of my writer's group. Plus. . . Plus . . .

And don't even get me started on my own lack of writing!

Sigh. But do know that I'm missing all you virtual buddies out there something crazy. And know that I have all kinds of half baked ideas for more crazy posts in the coming weeks. If I can find the time to get them out. For example, musings about real personality tests based on your favorite parts of children's Christmas specials. So bear with me. I will hopefully eke out a little more time. But for now I have to go harass my propane company because we ran out of gas and its 27 degrees outside.

Oy. Vey.

I hope the holiday season is treating YOU right!


Monday, December 9, 2013

Roller Derby and Motorcycle Hibernation

The first snow and ice hit last night, and we all know what that means.

Why, winterization of my motorcycle, of course.

Ever since my spill back in May, I haven't gotten back on, but there were several days where I was extremely tempted. There was just a lack of time factor holding me back. So next spring, I'm sure I'll be back on the road, tooling around on the beloved Ninja.

Ava Quinn, contemporary Romance author, hot romance, funny blog, hilarious blog, ninja motorcycle, contemporary western romance novels, hot romance novels
Ahh, can't you hear it purring like a panther from there?

The local roller derby team is in its off season as well. I was able to get a picture of this slippery character at one of the last bouts I attended. The saucy minx winked at me as he passed by.

Ava Quinn romance author, Ava Quinn, contemporary romance author, funny blog, roller derby, hilarious blog, hot romances, contemporary western romance novels
If you can't see his shirt, it reads "Full Commando?"

His beard came about halfway down the front of his shirt. And all my regular readers know how I cherish certain types of facial hair art.  His though, not so much. I think he had been sampling some of the chocolate covered bacon on a stick they sell there, as some sort of flavor savers were present.


But I did get to add to my growing tee shirt collection.


Ava Quinn, @AvaQuinnWrites, roller derby, hilarious blog, funny blog, contemporary western romance author, contemporary romance novels, hot romance
Ava Quinn, @AvaQuinnWrites, contemporary romance author Ava Quinn, contemporary Western romance, roller derby, funny blog

Ava Quinn, @AvaQuinnWrites, contemporary romance author Ava Quinn, contemporary Western romance, roller derby, funny blog
Look at all the lovelies!!!
So now that the motorcycle is sleeping and roller derby is done, I'm at a loss for any kickass winter diversions. Maybe I'll take up curling.

Any cool suggestions for an ennui ridden gnome would be greatly appreciated.

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Time - Who's Got It?

I sure as heck don't. I've been crazy busy this past week and a half. And I don't see an end in sight. Last year I got very stern with myself. I was working on saying no. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten much better at it.

Tonight I have a "Britches"* meeting to attend where I will be discussing the kid's activities I'll be in charge of for the New Year's Eve drop in my community.

*It's called this because the little old lady in charge had a five foot tall by five foot wide pair of pants (breeches) custom made that we lower from a flag pole at midnight. Yes, I'm telling the truth, and surprisingly, no, it wasn't my idea.

It's about 6 of us running the entire thing. And I'm the young blood. Sigh. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Blue haired little old ladies are my Kryptonite. I cannot say no to them. I've scaled back my part in these proceedings to upkeeping the website I designed for them and planning and running children's activities until 10 pm. I used to solicit funds and food donations, and distribute advertising flyers as well. But this year with my new job, I've had to be firm with the "blue hairs".

I also volunteered to run the environmental field day for my girls' schools in the spring. I did this last year and it took a toll. I developed two curriculums, aligned to the state's science standards incorporating outdoor science education activities and ran both days at the local state park. I created all the activities, shopped for all the supplies, recruited and organized all the volunteers, busing, park naturalist, and more. Now I need to start thinking about this year's new curriculums and start researching activities. Not looking forward to giving up my writing time for that.

So in the interest of saving time, I've gathered some great holiday shopping ideas for us all.

First up- Kiss Pez.

Yes, gentle readers, now you can get your sweet tooth and your rock on at the same time.
Ava Quinn, funny blog, contemporary western romance, Kiss, hot romance, contemporary romance author
It even includes a collector's tin! Now how much would you pay?
Here is yet another way to immortalize Gene Simmons and his tongue. Because we can't have too many renderings of that.

Many of you remember the year I was the county's 'Possum Queen. I was really busy that year with all my trailer park grand re-openings, but I still stand by my endorsed 'possum products. Though, the opossum fur willie warmer is not for the faint of heart.

And as always, you can find excellent gifts for all your angry mob needs at my online store, The Angry Villager. While you're ordering your engraved pitchfork, be sure to tell the operator standing by that I sent you. It's good for 8% off your total order.

Hope this helps with your holiday shopping and saves you lots of time! I aim to please.

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