tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post2487951659108942490..comments2024-03-10T04:51:35.761-04:00Comments on Tongue In Cheek: DistractedAva Quinnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09404716744982870650noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-21217933629208602622019-01-11T08:36:15.730-05:002019-01-11T08:36:15.730-05:00Let as many valuable texts as possible.
sexy girls...Let as many valuable texts as possible.<br /><a href="http://cheap-london-escort.com/blog/story/our-escorts-girls" rel="nofollow">sexy girls in London</a><br />Piotr LAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03882320988976372331noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-22231529018437812162014-12-27T21:03:37.521-05:002014-12-27T21:03:37.521-05:00@Julie- Thanks! hope your holiday has been very me...@Julie- Thanks! hope your holiday has been very merry!<br /><br />@Beer- Thanks, guys. This is very helpful. I'm def. gonna play with this version. You guys rock!<br /><br />@Christine- Thanks! hope you and yours, (esp. your little one:)) are having a grand time!<br /><br />@Jemi- Thanks! We're trying!<br /><br />@Stephanie- Great advice. I'm splitting my limited holiday time btwn 2 different stories. The next in this series and a different series.Ava Quinnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09404716744982870650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-62924458068719065632014-12-24T10:23:32.911-05:002014-12-24T10:23:32.911-05:00I've found it helps to just start a new projec...I've found it helps to just start a new project once I've sent something off. At that point, all you can do is drive yourself crazy, so writing something new is a good distraction!Stephanie Farishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10461865229341760836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-70928018001246219852014-12-22T20:41:15.728-05:002014-12-22T20:41:15.728-05:00Every year the holidays sneak up more quickly! Har...Every year the holidays sneak up more quickly! Hard to believe they're here!! Hope you manage to squeeze in some enjoyment among the chaos :)Jemi Fraserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02214408467456320167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-42413672033011101402014-12-22T18:41:29.946-05:002014-12-22T18:41:29.946-05:00Wait, what? The holidays are here? Yikes! They did...Wait, what? The holidays are here? Yikes! They did suddenly pounce upon us. I hope you and yours have a very holly jolly Christmas! :)Christine Rainshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08263694662585963900noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-57809132812636411322014-12-21T13:55:15.051-05:002014-12-21T13:55:15.051-05:00Ah yes, the eternal waiting that is the sent query...Ah yes, the eternal waiting that is the sent query letter. You'll get there. Just hang in there.<br /><br />Liz already said a great piece, and as you already confirmed, there's a lot going on in there. Perhaps too much. One thing I learned about queries/synopses is that you don't have to tell EVERYTHING about the story. For example, "A case gone cold." I'm sure that's very important for your story as a whole, but for a 3 paragraph synopsis, it's not as important. After all, the focus as a whole is Sheridan and the trouble she's in, not Ethan's case going cold. I mean, we still know she's in danger by implicating these men in that murder, and adding that the case is cold doesn't really serve to add to that danger. Just by removing that detail and linking those first couple of sentences I think it reads a lot cleaner.<br /><br />Loose example:<br /><br /><i>Sheriff Ethan Bankert doesn’t have time for a woman like Sheridan, but the beautiful hustler picked the wrong men to con—after all, they’re the main suspects in his father’s murder. Whether she wants to believe him or not, tangling with them has painted a bulls-eye on her back. Now, with Sheridan under his roof, protective custody takes on a whole new meaning. If he could just convince her to press charges, not only could he keep her safe, it would be the opening he’s been looking for to continue his investigation.</i><br /><br />Good luck, and I hope this helps!A Beer for the Showerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17029139745335325356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-47626616961339247182014-12-21T05:27:38.150-05:002014-12-21T05:27:38.150-05:00You had me at the "sexy-as-sin" sheriff!...You had me at the "sexy-as-sin" sheriff! I'm sure you'll be chanting "Serenity Now," as you watch your lady friends drop trou from a flagpole! Good luck with your captivating query! Happy Holidays, Ava!<br /><br />JulieEmpty Nest Insiderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10074223969046687064noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-69416915151880891382014-12-19T16:31:30.720-05:002014-12-19T16:31:30.720-05:00@Ivy- Thanks for the support! And mmmm. Jammies fo...@Ivy- Thanks for the support! And mmmm. Jammies forever. ::Drifts off into a happy place where everyone wears comfy pjs.::<br /><br />@Pat-Thanks!<br /><br />@Lexa- Thanks! Yes, the stalking must end. I just don't know how! lol!<br /><br />@Beth Ellyn - Thanks so much! You have a great holiday too!!<br /><br />@S.K. - Thanks. Hope things calm down for us both soon. Have a great holiday!!<br /><br />@Kate- :groans: I know! But its soooo hard!! lol! :) I'm plotting book 2 and have written a bit on it. I'm also working on a separate project as well. But my pace is slower than usual due to the all-consuming pins and needles! lol!!<br /><br />@Liz- Trying not to burn out those frazzled nerves. :) Pronoun Trouble! Reminded me of one of my favorite Bugs Bunny cartoons! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyPFQKpRnd0 I'm trying to push a lot in that paragraph. Which is a problem. But I feel like it all needs to be there to show the stakes and the reason she just doesn't leave town. sigh. But, hustling isn't illegal since it's not a game of chance like say poker or craps. Thanks for your input. I'm gonna try it and see what I come up with. Have a fantastic holiday!<br /><br />@Cathrina- Waiting is the worst! I never knew I was so impatient! lol! Thanks and have a wonderful holiday! Ava Quinnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09404716744982870650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-58072597195660538532014-12-19T15:30:08.827-05:002014-12-19T15:30:08.827-05:00This holiday had crept on at warp speed!!! I hope ...This holiday had crept on at warp speed!!! I hope you hear good news. I'm the same way checking my email for the dreaded rejections, but you might be surprised!!! Have A Merry Christmas!!!Cathrina Constantinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16960849263181625782noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-62988867793435329902014-12-19T15:02:49.204-05:002014-12-19T15:02:49.204-05:00UGH the waiting game is the worst! All I can reall...UGH the waiting game is the worst! All I can really offer in terms of encouragement is that eventually the nerves get so frazzled from being constantly anxious that they just stop working: you wear yourself out. Fun, right??<br /><br />Hang in there. I hope GOOD NEWS is coming for you soon!<br /><br />I agree that the second paragraph of your query is the problematic one. The first thing I noticed is that you're having some pronoun confusion. Is Sheridan the "beautiful hustler"? And is she the "she" and is Ethan the "he"? I know it sounds dumb, but I was honestly confused. Try writing out their names in every sentence to just clarify and then you can cut the extras out. <br /><br />I'm also not quite sure what's happening in that paragraph. Should it be "wrong men" or "wrong man"? Are the men the ones she conned? And they hurt her - or why else would she press charges? And can she if she hustled them in the first place?<br /><br />I did figure it out once I read it carefully a few times, but I think you can easily clarify it. The pronouns will help, but even a little bit of clarifying words will help, too. What about something like, "Sheriff Ethan Bankert doesn’t have time for a woman, but Sheridan is beautiful, and in danger to boot: she picked the wrong men to con. Ethan should know - those same men are the main suspects in his father's murder case."<br /><br />I don't want to rewrite it for you, but that sort of language will just help the reader pick up the story more easily. Make sense? If not, email me: lizblocker at gmail. <br /><br />Hope this helps!!! :)Liz Blockerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16160510626027597666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-52221095404550130712014-12-19T12:49:42.209-05:002014-12-19T12:49:42.209-05:00I think your query is good. Best thing to do whil...I think your query is good. Best thing to do while you're nervously waiting for news about a MS that's out is to start a new one. Or write a short story or two. Anything to keep your mind from bing 100% focused on what might be happening to the book that's out.Kate Larkindalehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06202347563426692610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-59611396542055626622014-12-19T12:23:45.335-05:002014-12-19T12:23:45.335-05:00"I'm frazzled and jittery and a donkey on..."I'm frazzled and jittery and a donkey on the edge." Yeah, me too . . . different reasons but I share the feeling. The query is solid and intriguing, best of luck!SK Anthonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04601373778228160390noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-47031972841038864532014-12-19T10:05:49.707-05:002014-12-19T10:05:49.707-05:00hehe. "SERENITY NOW" gotta love Seinfeld...hehe. "SERENITY NOW" gotta love Seinfeld. I read your query twice and I think it's solid. Definitely intrigued me, and as long as you're getting requests that's the important thing! I'm keeping everything crossed for you...querying this time of year is not fun. Hang in there and happy holidays! :) Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07181207761130079393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-57286388142611257482014-12-19T08:42:48.364-05:002014-12-19T08:42:48.364-05:00I think your query blurb is amazing and very profe...I think your query blurb is amazing and very professional. I hope you get lots more requests. I can tell you from personal experience that staling your email doesn't work. I can also tell you I did it too!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07735576044552810103noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-36874983623602157542014-12-18T19:59:58.950-05:002014-12-18T19:59:58.950-05:00Sometimes you just have to shout indeed, don't...Sometimes you just have to shout indeed, don't fry any nerves, it isn't fun lolPat Hatthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07745293224202430152noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1380936767403386158.post-1114313410303217662014-12-18T16:13:16.770-05:002014-12-18T16:13:16.770-05:00I am no help in the area that you are writing but ...I am no help in the area that you are writing but I will be here to cheer you along the way. <br /><br />Now I'm headed back to watch that clip. Rice on the stove, chores all nearly done, baking done for the day. Soon to shower and get into my jams FOREVER!The Happy Whiskhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13438469476168485775noreply@blogger.com