I have essential tremor at a very young age. It usually manifests in people in their 60s. It will most likely progress to my other hand, neck and head, but won't kill me. There are drugs I can take to help "once it becomes handicapping".
Still a lot to process. But I'm so thankful it's not one of the ones that were a death sentence.
So now I will whole heartedly confirm that this is my face:
But it is. I have medical proof. After seeing my doctor about my hand tremor, and other crazy symptoms from the last post, she prepped me for possibilities. MS, brain tumor, Parkinson's, ALS. And ordered an MRI. Which was a little slice of hell unto itself. But I got the results back, and my brain is "perfectly normal".
Though I don't know how many of you who've read my blog would agree.
It's been a severely nerve wracking wait. I'm unbelievably glad the big heavy hitters are off the table, but now I'm down the rabbit hole of "what is this?". And am still waiting. For a neurologist appointment.
Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers. They definitely helped sustain me.
You know how on most roller coasters you gingerly crest that first hill. Like a deep breath holding back a hurricane? Well, that's where I am right now.
For the past two months my left hand has been shaking noticeably. Kinda like this.
Not quite that bad, but pretty close. I finally go tonight to speak to my doctor about it. I've been having trouble recalling words and finishing my sentences. And I've been exhausted. As in taking-somewhat-involuntary-naps-in-the-middle-of-the-afternoon exhausted.
Those things could be from the stress. Or the worry. Or the depression as my brain spins every worst case scenario it can imagine. Which, as writers, we know we can make it really bad.
So I'm poised at the top of this hill, hoping like hell this will be a kiddie sized ride instead of the screaming, tear your face off with g-forces twist and turns variety.
I've taken a break from writing and this blog. I miss visiting you guys and the camaraderie you all so easily share.
I'll be back when I can. I know you'll all be here because you've been such an awesome, supportive group.