Sunday, November 25, 2012


I'm dealing with a lot of shit here.

My beloved dog, whom we've had for almost fifteen years is really reaching the end now. She was diagnosed with cancer just after Christmas last year, and it's been a year of every day is a bonus, but watching her decline more and more just has been breaking my heart all year long. It's getting very close to the end now, and it's killing me.

I'm trying to list on Ebay for this holiday selling season, which takes a lot of time and energy that I don't seem to have any more of.

I'm trying to deal with all the new responsibilities of becoming the president of my writer's group. Which entail reading bylaws and policy and procedures among other things. I haven't gotten very far.

I'm trying to write more, but with the Urchins being off school for Thanksgiving for the last 11 days, nothing got written at all.

I'm on the committee with the blue haired old ladies for our township's new year's celebration. And after about thirty minutes into the meeting, I wish I could be like Sheldon Cooper when he stops a conversation because it has come full circle. But I just can't. Plus I have lots of responsibilities and footwork to do for them.

Because I'm at home, I feel obligated to volunteer in my girls' classrooms around once or twice a week.

And I just want to curl up into a ball and hide my head under a desk like the children in an atomic bomb drill from the fifties.


Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving

Have a safe and wonderful Thanksgiving everyone. I know I'm going to need a little humor to get through the holiday this year. So here's my favorite Thanksgiving scene. Enjoy and happy Thanksgiving, Citizens.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Heard From The Back of the Minivan

Oldest Urchin - Mom, if you adopt a new kid. . .

Me - WTH wrinkle between  my eyes: to self When did I start adopting kids?

O.U.- And they come to live with us. . .

The Man- Shoots me a bushy eyed "Is there something I should know?" glance that says When did you start adopting kids?

O.U. - Can they sleep in my top bunk and then I can have the green bedroom?

*Silence for about three seconds where crickets chirp*

Youngest Urchin - *Excessively indignant* I'm not sleeping with THAT kid!

Friday, November 16, 2012

Support Your Local Authors

Tomorrow two great local authors will be over at the Camphill Barnes and Noble signing their latest releases. Natalie Damschroder and Megan Hart.

Both of these gals had the grit and temerity to run the gauntlet of the Sea Monkey S.A.T. portion of my author interview questions. You can check out their answers below.

Natalie's Interview

Megan's Interview

If you're in the area, it'd be great if you'd stop in and say hello to these great ladies. I'm planning on stopping in, if I can get my tracking anklet clearance approved by the Urchins. And if it isn't too cold, I may just ride the motorcycle to boot! Two hours footloose and fancy free with writer friends. Who could ask for anything more?

So what are your big weekend plans, since mine are only one step above hypothetical? Let me live vicariously through you.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Seasick Steve And Voice Mail Evilness

Here's a real life character. I really dig his music. The guitar he uses in the song below has more strings than his others. He even has a one stringed instrument made from a hunk of wood, two crushed soda cans and a string that almost looks like a rubber band. But boy can he make it sing!

Here he is playing I Started Out With Nothing.

Onto other news. I've been doing battle with the Dept. of Education's website and voice mail system. Delynn was right to choose voice mail as her minion. It's pure EVIL!

I'm trying to get information on my teaching certificate's status. And it's not easy to come by taking the prescribed Dept. of Ed. route. I may have to re-open my store The Angry Villager and deal with them on my terms.

Which brings me to my writing. Which has not been going well lately. I'm running out of time to be home with my kiddos and writing while I'm here. And I haven't made the most of it. I'm trying to turn that around, but it's tough. We'll see if I make some of the more lofty goals I've set for myself. I won't even consult my Magic Eight Ball. I swear that thing is stacked against me in the answers department.

Until Next time, Citizens!

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Here's To Characters Like . . .

Polk Salad Annie.

Her whole family is an interesting bunch. Just listen.

Fun stuff. But then I've always thought the Blues and Country song writers were an inventive lot.

Who or what has inspired you? What songs have made you smile and want to turn them up to 11 recently?

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Delynn Royer- A Touch of Camelot Author Interview

Please welcome Delynn Royer to Tongue in Cheek.


Delynn Royer is the older, smarter, funnier, more ornery alter ego of author Donna Grove, who, as a young mother, published lighthearted historical romances with Harper Paperbacks. Her first book, A Touch of Camelot,  won an RWA Golden Heart award. Since then, Delynn has kept busy working the dreaded day job and raising her two sons.

Now, however, her sons are grown and she has returned to her first love, writing. She's currently at work updating her backlist to be made available as e-books and penning a new romantic mystery series.

AQ: Thanks for agreeing to answer some interview questions about yourself and your new book.

DR: Sure, Ava. I’m excited to be here!

AQ: So, what is your book about?

DR: A Touch of Camelot is the first of my backlist titles to be updated for e-readers. It’s a sensual, upbeat Western historical romance with a Camelot twist. Here’s the blurb.

Set in Kansas and San Francisco, 1879. Guinevere Pierce was raised at the knee of one of he slickest con artists in the West, but can she con her way out of this one?

When Gwin and her kid brother Arthur become witnesses to murder and then targets themselves. there's no time for games. There's only time to run.

Cole Shepherd is a new Pinkerton detective. His first assignment? To escort the beautiful and deceptive Gwin Pierce and her brother across the country to testify.

When Gwin sets eyes on her Pinkerton escort, she's stunned. Cole's is the face that has haunted her romantic dreams since she was a girl. He's her Sir Lancelot, but now he's her captor. And he's leading them toward a trap that Gwin must convince him could cost them their lives.

AQ: Can you share an interesting behind the scenes tidbit about your story?

DR: People ask where writers get their ideas. I wish I knew. One thing that made this book fun to write was mixing a Camelot theme with the Old West, but that’s not how it started.

About two chapters in, I decided the heroine’s name didn’t feel right. She was Gwen then, and so I changed her to Gwin, which could be short for Guinevere. I wondered why a mother would give her child such a beautiful but tragic name, and the Camelot theme grew from there.

AQ: What is your favorite part of the story writing process?

DR: The moment when my characters start to come off the page, when they begin to lead rather than follow. That’s when they show me where the story is going, whether I planned it or not. So fun!

AQ: Writing can be such an isolated enterprise. Yet, I’m sure there are people who have helped, guided or inspired you along the way to becoming a published author. Could you tell us about one of them and how they helped you?

DR: It took a village. A certain Pennwriters critique group comes to mind, as do critique partners from RWA, including Ginny Aiken, Kathy DiSanto (and you, Ava!). Without that support, I never would have had the gumption to finish a manuscript. I must especially thank Karen Rose Smith for her generous support and encouragement.

AQ: What are you working on now/next?

DR: A romantic mystery set in 1920s Manhattan. It’s about a burned out homicide detective who teams up with a perky girl reporter to solve the Central Park murder of a notorious bootlegger. It’s got dead bodies, snappy dialogue, and a splash of romance.

AQ: I can testify to that!! It's wonderful!

Now on to the S.A.T. portion of the interview:

Fill in the blank –
If I were a villain, I would have __________ for minions to deliver my wrath because _________.  (And remember, sea monkeys are already spoken for. Mostly)

DR: Automated phone systems because there’s no more evil creature than a robot that prompts you to repeat yourself five times, then puts you on hold for fifteen minutes, then brightly informs you that all lines are busy and to try again later. Click.

Sea Monkeys are to ____________ as zombie stinkbugs are to ________________.

DR: Unsuspecting aquariums
Innocent vacuum cleaner bags
And no, I don’t know what that means. :)

AQ: Please tell us where we can find out more about you and where we can buy your books.

DR: To find all of my e-books available now for Kindle, visit my Amazon author page at

For non-Kindle owners, I’m busy converting my books for other online retailers. A Touch of Camelot is now available from Smashwords at

Or visit me anytime at
And for an excerpt from A Touch of Camelot, visit Only Romance at

Thanks again for stopping in, Delynn!

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Delynn Royer Will Be Here!

Author of light historical romance, Delynn Royer will be here on Wednesday to run the gauntlet of author interview questions here at Tongue in Cheek.  Stop by and check out her newest release and see how she fares on the dreaded Sea Monkey S.A.T.s!

Don't be fooled by their wholesome appearance. They're deadly.

To see how other intrepid authors have answered in the past, check out the former interviewees.

Vicky Burkholder

Natalie J. Damschroder

Susan Gourley

Megan Hart 

Misty Simon

See you Wednesday, Citizens!

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