It was a long and grueling struggle, but the Gnome/Hillbilly Contingency prevailed. We rousted those polka playing zealots right back to the underground where they belong.
With the Gnome Defense League's infamous element of surprise on our side and the crack redneck special forces behind us, we handed them their asses.
We had gnomes hidden everywhere - armed to the teeth.
We even had Gnome Commandos dropping from the roof like a scourge of the skies.
We meant business.
But don't be fooled. The schnitzel truck was no easy target. Those polka fiends brought the big guns. Literally.
It was a fierce and bloody battle and there were casualties on both sides.
But as the Redneck S.W.A.T. team laid down cover fire, a hootin' and a-hollerin' the whole time, Ninja Gnome crept in and planted explosives on the schnitzel truck.
And the war was won!
The after party was what legends are made of. It went on for a week. I've finally just taken back my yard. That's what took so long in bringing you the final update on the Polka Apocalypse.
Look for the party recap soon. Until then, Citizens: Beware the demon rhythms of the Polka!!!
12 hours ago