Friday, June 12, 2009

Can You Believe It?

The Jehovah's Witnesses came back! They were just here. I, in polite but no uncertain terms, told them not to darken my door ever again.

The woman had the audacity to tell me that I asked her to come back. Now, what person in their right mind would ask the JW's to come back? Seriously? Who? Especially at nine o'clock in the morning! If you've been following the saga,(here and here) you know I definitely did not.

So now some delusional zealot is out there unleashed on the unsuspecting populace, knocking on doors in her sensible shoes, and pestering others.

Hmmm. I'm okay with that, I've taken my share of abuse. It's time to spread it around a little. In fact, I gave her Vicki and Natalie's addresses, and told her they would love to sit and chat with her.

Well, gotta go. I'm too busy laughing evilly and rubbing my hands together to type any more. Have a good weekend!

13 comments:

Victoria said...

Oh no, you didn't! LOL
I'll take right good care of them should they decide to show up here!

Ava Quinn said...

I thought you'd be happy. It'll distract the natives and make them rethink the "I'm bored" sentiment!

Dara Edmondson said...

Sounds like the JWs have targeted you like a dart from a stun gun! Good luck with that;-)

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

HEY! What did we do to deserve that?!

Oh, well, if they go to V's first, they'll never make it over here...

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

First of all, you don't know my address, correct?
Second, did that JW tell you an out right lie? How sinful?
You should have told her you were prepared to listen until she lied. Now you know she's just like the rest of them!

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks, Dara. I'm at my wits end. I may have to start leaving elaborate Rube Goldberg traps just to get rid of her.

Ava Quinn said...

You, Natalie, were not at the meeting, so I have carte blanche to target you. ;)

Ava Quinn said...

No, Sue. You're safe. I don't have your address. But I may send her your way if she comes back yet again. You've got all the good answers. I believe you are strong enough to defeat her.

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

But...but...*splutter*

Okay, here's why I wasn't at the meeting:

D had a soccer game in Waynesboro at 9:00 a.m.

Me: "Oh, I have these directions here from the soccer club, and I was just down there, it's about an hour away. I don't need to Googlemap it or note the actual street address."

Murphy: *snicker* "Let me show you what happens when you deviate from your normal habits."

Directions: "We suck."

Sally (husband's GPS): "What do you mean, no address? K-Mart? It's right here! Oh, you mean the OTHER K-Mart."

Assistant Coach: "Well, here you are just before halftime. Let me tell you what an awesome game you're missing."

D: *heads the ball five times, counting once that was just her head being in the way*

Referee: *displays blatant home team bias*

Home team: *shoveshovetrippushpunch*

Teammate: *scores, 4 seconds left, we win, first place woohoo!*

Me: "Fine, you're think the GPS is so great, we'll use it to get home"

GPS: "out of network"

Us, middle of God knows where: "Fuck."
~~~~~~~~~
Now I ask you, does that deserve JW punishment?

M.J. Fifield said...

Hehe...they were in my parents' neighborhood this morning. I saw them as I was leaving and thought about stopping to tell them that the last person they would ever want to talk to was my father. My good deed for the day or something like that.

Ava Quinn said...

Would you be doing a good deed for your father or the Jehovah's Witnesses? Because today I cannot endorse any good deeds aimed at the JW's. Maybe tomorrow. But not today! ;)

Ava Quinn said...

Ok Natalie, you're off the hook this time! =)

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

Phew! Thanks! :)

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