And it's a very scary sight. I don't even want to think about how much sugar I've consumed in the last four days. I'm working the detox as we speak. I haven't been able to blog because my hands were shaking too severely to type.
I had a nice holiday. One day was especially awesome. The most productive thing I did that day was put the red five on the black six. Ahhh. The memories.
So the in-laws got us a Wii. I will now never complete any manuscript ever. I will, however order a pink and black bowling shirt with a crown made of bowling pins embroidered on the back with the name Pin Princess stitched over the breast pocket. I'll also be heading a clinic on my patented Lollipop Release Technique tm - guaranteed to improve your score by at least 3 points or your money back. You too can join this elite ten class series for only nine easy installments of $9.99.
Or could I interest you in a slightly used Hawaii chair?
So, resolutions. I don't believe in them. They're like mystical rainbow farting unicorns, only applicable in the perfect hermetically sealed environs of your Happy Place where everything is perfect. What do you mean you don't have rainbow farting unicorns in your happy place? What's the matter with you? You have no idea what you're missing.