Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Coming Down Off the Sugar

And it's a very scary sight. I don't even want to think about how much sugar I've consumed in the last four days. I'm working the detox as we speak. I haven't been able to blog because my hands were shaking too severely to type.

I had a nice holiday. One day was especially awesome. The most productive thing I did that day was put the red five on the black six. Ahhh. The memories.

So the in-laws got us a Wii. I will now never complete any manuscript ever. I will, however order a pink and black bowling shirt with a crown made of bowling pins embroidered on the back with the name Pin Princess stitched over the breast pocket. I'll also be heading a clinic on my patented Lollipop Release Technique tm - guaranteed to improve your score by at least 3 points or your money back. You too can join this elite ten class series for only nine easy installments of $9.99.

Or could I interest you in a slightly used Hawaii chair?

So, resolutions. I don't believe in them. They're like mystical rainbow farting unicorns, only applicable in the perfect hermetically sealed environs of your Happy Place where everything is perfect. What do you mean you don't have rainbow farting unicorns in your happy place? What's the matter with you? You have no idea what you're missing.

11 comments:

Susan Kelley said...

Love the unicorn. Thank goodness I'm not a sugar inhaler. At least you have your addictions to blame for lack of progress. I have none. Woe is me.

Ava Quinn said...

Yeah. Addictions are great as excuses. That's why I keep so many. That way if I get a tiny amount done, it seems huge.

I can always work the angles.

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

Yay, Wii!

You crack me the hell up, every time I come over here. I don't know why, but you don't seem like you're this funny, until then you are. It's weird.

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

Yay, Wii!

You crack me the hell up, every time I come over here. I don't know why, but you don't seem like you're this funny, until then you are. It's weird.

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks? I think. Though I'm not quite sure. lol.

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

LOL You can take it as a compliment. It's just that you're a mom and a biker chick, which give certain imagery, neither of which are bubbly, wacky humor.

Maybe it's just the haircut.

Ava Quinn said...

What's the matter with my haircut?

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

Nothing's WRONG with your haircut, silly! It's beautiful, and I'm very jealous because it's the cut I want and my hair won't do anymore. But it's, like, professional and sleek and stuff. Restrained. And your humor is so NOT! LOL

Ava Quinn said...

Whew. I was worried there for a minute!

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

Sorry. You think I'd be more eloquent!

Happy New Year!

Ava Quinn said...

Happy New Year to you too!

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