Thursday, November 7, 2013

Resurrection Blogfest II

Hi Everybody! Today is Resurection Blogfest, run by the incomparable, Mina Lobo.

Resurrection Blogfest II!

This is the easiest blogfest around, and I almost missed it, due to all the cold medicine and other craziness going on around here. I'm not savvy enough at the moment to get the blogfest picture into the sidebar, so it disqualifies me from the prize drawing, but that's okay by me. I just wanted to be part of the cool kids participating. All you had to do is repost an old blog post from the past year you thought hadn't gotten the love it deserved.

So without further ado, I'm unearthing a post from back in March of this year.

Mutton Chops-A Closer Study of The Art of the Sideburn

Today we take a closer look at a very popular expression of male facial hair as we delve into the mutton chop. This in depth analysis of one of the many different categories of male facial hair builds on my previous homage to the art of the sideburn.

Mutton chops are long, sometimes bushy, sideburns that reach either the jawline or connect to a mustache. They can be trimmed and stylized in any number of ways. As such.

pic from brooklyndaily.com
It has been my experience that if a man has mutton chops, there are only four occupations he is able to hold.

1. Elvis impersonator.

Elvis did right by the mutton chop in the seventies.



 And the impersonators know it. Have a look.

pic from lasvegassun.com


2. Lumberjack
I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay . . . with my mutton chops.





3. Motorcycle gang member
But let it be known that a mutton chop wearing member cannot rise in the hierarchy above the level of "thug". Leaders must make special facial hair concessions and have either a ZZ Top beard or a Fu Manchu mustache.



4. Horror film hillbilly extra #6

 One through five being taken by other men with bushy beards or very scraggly mustaches.

So that's it on the mutton chop except to declare them magnificent. (Just like the mullet) And to prove my point, I leave you with this.

Nothing but mutton chops, baby!

Which career path would you choose if mutton chops adorned your mug?

****~~~***

So there it is, Citizens. My take on some wicked-awesome facial do's. Next time, I'll really talk about writing and music. Until then, let me know about your facial hair preferences in the comments!

29 comments:

Bevimus said...

Hysterical! What a great re-post!

And thank you SO MUCH for connecting with me! Hazah!

Anonymous said...

Adding to my repertoire of useless, I mean intriguing, things I know way too much about. Thanks for the giggles today :)

L.G. Keltner said...

Love it, love it, love it! Male facial hair is apparently more fascinating than I'd realized.

Mina Lobo said...

ROTFL, Ava! This post slayed me! :-D Ineligible for the drawing, alas, but a damned fine read. So glad you joined in! <3

Al Penwasser said...

Whenever I try to grow facial hair, I end up looking either like Yassir Arafat or that guy Festus from 'Gunsmoke.'
It's a hideous look for me, especially since they're both dead.

Al Penwasser said...

Whenever I try to grow facial hair, I end up looking either like Yassir Arafat or that guy Festus from 'Gunsmoke.'
It's a hideous look for me, especially since they're both dead.

Ava Quinn said...

Hey Beverly! Loved your piece. And I'm always glad to meet another Eastern PA resident. I lived in Audubon, PA for the first 24 years of my life and had many summer jobs in the KofP Mall!

Ava Quinn said...

Any time, J.M! That's mainly what I'm about here. The absurdities. For some reason they seem to find me. Go figure. lol! Thanks for stopping by!

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks for stopping by, L.G. Yes, there are many statements to be made by men with a well placed or interesting sideburn. Some, though, we wish they just wouldn't.

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks for the Tweet out, Mina. Great blogfest. I was determined to join in this year because I love the concept. But lifus interuptus has had me in a stranglehold for a month. So I didn't get everything set up correctly. There's always next year!

Glad you liked the post. It was either this or my ruminations on Bratz dolls and how they're the precursor to a hostile alien takeover. I think this one may have been a little classier.

Ava Quinn said...

Yassir Arafat. Hilarious, Al! Glad you stopped by and were amused.

Cathrina Constantine said...

Hahahaaa...my husband had mutton chops when we started dating! Thanks for the chuckle. Great resurrection post, Ava.

Unknown said...

LOL. This was perfect to resurrect! I can always count on you to make me laugh!

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

Well, I think I'll have to interview Hugh Jackman to decide what the best use of muttonchops is. Interview him exactly as he appears in that picture.

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks, Cathrina! So, were you a fan of the mutton chops on your husband, or were you not having it? LOL!

Ava Quinn said...

Thanks, Ashley! < blushing >

Ava Quinn said...

I want in on that interview, Sue! Call me when it's set up!

Cathrina Constantine said...

Ava, I've nominated you for an award if you wish to accept. Check out my blog at http://cathrinaconstantine.blogspot.com

Crystal Collier said...

LOL! Number 4. Definitely number 4. I'll be the one wielding the ax. ;)

Ava Quinn said...

Ooooohh, an excellent choice. lol! Thanks for stopping by! :D

Sherry Ellis said...

If I sported mutton chops, I'd have to be a motorcycle gangster. It's so not me, so I'd have to see what it's like! ;0)

Ava Quinn said...

LOL! Yes, a violin virtuoso motorcycle gang member! Now there's a story idea if I ever heard one, Sherry! :D

Unknown said...

Just when I'm chuckling, thinking mutton chops are the height of visual comedy, you give me Elvis and Wolverine. Ooooh! I'm forced to agree - mutton chops ROCK!

Thanks for commenting on my blog - and who says I haven't had a 4-hr sleep induced psychotic break? *giggle, shifty eyes, giggle*

Pat Hatt said...

I don't think I could stand any of that. Blah, I never knew facial hair was so exciting though lol

Ava Quinn said...

LOL! Lexa. Loved the shifty eyed giggle!

Ava Quinn said...

I agree, Pat. It's gotta bee so itchy. And wooly. It takes a special kind of man, I guess. lol.

Thanks for chiming in!

Liz Blocker said...

HA! You're so right - this post deserved a good resurrection. Huzzah for the mutton chop!

Ava Quinn said...

lol, Liz!

bradmaddox said...
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