My Opthalmologist Tried To Shiv My Eye

Okay, that might be a bit of an overstatement. But still, it was a terrifying encounter.

So I'm in the chair at the eye doctor with my chin on the chin rest, and the ocular device that always reminds me of some type of steam punk contraption is lowered in front of my eyes. And I'm feeling a bit like Hannibal Lecter in his face cage. I refrained from telling the doctor I loved his suit. (Yay me. Look at my growth in the self restraint department.)

Anywho, the bright white light is shining in my eye, so all I have is my peripheral vision, and all the while the doctor is quietly talking in eye doctor jargon to the nurse about what he sees. All of the sudden I catch him saying in his low monotone, ". . . a lash on lower right epilating."

My brain latched onto that word, epilating. I knew I'd heard it before or some derivation thereof. And then I remembered it deals with skin and the epidermis. Then my brain jumped to The EPILADY! (Cue voice of doom.)

That's when I see him reach down and grab the hugest, pointiest pair of tweezers I've ever seen and start raising them towards my eye! I don't even have time to blink. Literally. And then they are at my eye and I can only see the edges of what's going on because the white light is still blinding me and I'm trying to talk myself down from going towards the light in a whole Poltergeist sort of way and then he grabs my eyelash and rips it out of my head.

It hurt like hell! And yet I survived to tell the tale.

The doctor acted like he was doing me a favor since apparently it was poking my eye. Which I didn't feel. Though for two days after I felt exactly where he'd ripped it out of my eyelid.

So, eyelash plucking. Apparently just one more service my ophthalmologist offers that I  really could have done without.

So have you ever had unexpected adventures in the doctor's office? Or is it just me?

Should I Be Worried?

So the youngest Urchin, who I'll grant you, has always marched to the beat of her own drum has begun to worry me a little.

The Oldest Urchin, who watched the old Batman and Robin Movie and when they rolled up in the Batmobile to the Batcopter exclaimed, "Can it get any more action packed than this?!?" She's the girl who watched, enthralled and fearful for Batman's life as he was attacked by a shark.



She is now a super hero fanatic.

The youngest Urchin, however, loves to play the villains. Joker, Riddler, Catwoman, Two Face, Lex Luther. You name it.

The signs were there. Two years ago her Barbies were leading extremely tragic lives. And all the quotes from this post are her.

This is also the child who became Alice Cooper's biggest fan.

And now the villains.

Not that she could ever have learned it from me, mind you.

My Evil Plans Are Taking Shape
Thursday Ridiculousness
Super Villain Update

Huh. Maybe I should be more worried about myself.

My Mom Loved the Roller Derby!

Like daughter like mother, apparently. Last Sunday, yes Father's Day, my mom, the BFF and I went to the local roller derby bout. It was just as intense and fun and awesome as I'd remembered, and my mom loved it.

Fast hard-hitting action

There was even chocolate covered bacon on a stick to be had. As many of you know from my 'Possum Queen carny days, fried stuff on a stick is a rare treat for me, but surprisingly, I wasn't enticed to try these.

Along with chocolate covered breakfast meats, there was a local live band.

Saints of Sorrow

I didn't get too close for fear of being labeled a groupie. I'm much too old and dignified for that. So I pretended I was taking a picture of the guy in front's butt. The band was good, and even had my mom bopping along to the heavy metal beat.

Mom was so into the whole experience that she even wore one of my coveted home-team jerseys to the bout. I wore this one. And the BFF got me an entirely new one that night for my birthday!! Check it out!

Do you feel the mash up love?

So a great time was had by all. Including my seventy year old mother.

She visited for two weeks from Montana, and left two days ago. That, along with bylaw revisions, finaling in a writing contest and the wrap up of the two environmental field days I ran for 183 and 132 kids respectively, the final days of the school year for my Urchins,  and my oldest Urchin's dance recital tonight, I have been regretfully absent from my blog.

But that will change. All the lovely crazy that I can cram in will be here in future days. Though, I have vowed to take more time for my writing, so I may slip some more of that in here around all the lunacy. We'll see how that works.

So what have you been up to for the past few weeks? Inquiring mind (my own) wants to know!

Girl Rising - Watch it!

I just got back from a powerful film. Girl Rising.



I wasn't surprised by the information presented in it. These issues are important to me and I've familiarized myself with them for years. But the film brought them home in a very powerful and personal way.

They will be playing the film on CNN on June 16th at 9pm EST. I highly recommend it.

What was the most powerful thing you've seen or read that inspired you recently?

Wait. What?? Um, No. Just No.

Have you heard about this? I mean this even penetrated my environmental field day haze. Dunkin' Donuts is revealing a new breakfast sandwich this month.

Peppered egg, and bacon or a sausage patty between two halves of a GLAZED DOUGHNUT!!! Seriously. They're doing it.  This month. Check it out.

What's next, dipping it in guacamole and deep frying it?

I'm not sure what to say, so you say it for me in the comments.