Okay...

I wasn't really captured by crazed carnies. It was just more interesting than the truth.

The Man is a teacher, and I'm a preschool teacher, so back to school is killing us on all fronts. Between the Urchins getting ready, us getting ready, Oldest Urchin's birthday party on Saturday, my mother-in-law having cancer surgery tomorrow, and my father-in-law battling pneumonia, things are in ludicrous speed around Chez Quinn.

I have lots to share from camping, the back yard carnival and an award to graciously receive from the fantastic Marci Koski, plus general madness, but not the time to post it, soooo...

Bear with me. The craziness that is Tongue In Cheek will return. I'm just not sure when.

So here's some intermission music to tide you over in the meantime. (The chorus captures my sentiments exactly.)



Until next time, citizens!

Help! I've Been Kidnapped By Carnies!

Okay listen carefully. I've been taken prisoner by some sinister carnival folk who set up in the back yard last week. I've stolen one of their phones and plugged in remotely to the blog. They're debating on whether to make me be the bearded lady

or wear the two headed goat costume.

Send help! Quick!!

Back At The Desk

Hi Everybody! I'm back! I survived the two week camping trip, but am now drowning in laundry. Soooo, you know what that means.

Another rerun.

Wait, wait, put down the pitchforks (though hopefully you purchased them at my store, The Angry Villager). This rerun is from my vacation last summer to visit my folks in Montana. And there's lots of taxidermy involved.

I can tell I placated you with that last sentence. So sit back and enjoy...

More Fun With Taxidermied Squirrels (I'll be filling you in on all the gory camping details soon.)

Yes, folks, there's so much fun to be had with taxidermied squirrels. You didn't think I'd be able to find anything more entertaining than the ones from my previous post, did you? Well the gauntlet has been thrown down. Here are pictures of actual boxing taxidermied squirrels that I saw in all their moth-nibbled first hand glory when I visited Montana in July.

Upper cut. Upper cut. (Name that video game!)

Note the sheep in the background. This becomes important later.

EXTREME CLOSE UP!

 My mom sent me these photos since I'd forgotten to take them when I was there admiring coughshockedandmezmerizedinabadwaycough them in person. She included in the bottom of the email this picture that scared the ever loving crap out of me.

I could have done without that. (The lamb has a twin coming out of its back. Note the legs appearing as spider leg appendages and the two sets of ears.)

There was an entire case of taxidermied animals at this museum, and the Youngest Urchin, who just turned six, went through and named them all. Until she got to this one. She paused in her identifications, and deemed it, "A baby bobcat and its turkey friend."

Umm, friends don't let friends nibble on each other, Youngest Urchin. Just so you know.

And yet, despite the taxidermy, (or maybe because of it) a good time was had by all that day.

The Urchins, my mom and me. The Man is behind the camera.

What would you want to see in your taxidermy? Inquiring mind (me, of course) would like to know.

A Very Important Question

Hi everyone. I'm still on vacation. Camping. **bone wracking shudders** Here's hoping we all survive. So until I return, I'm leaving you with a rerun from 2010 which asks the question:

Tell Me Which You Would - The Bad or the Good?

How did it get to be Friday already? I'm having trouble getting that little factoid into my brain. I finished my dreaded synopsis of Shifting Her World. Thank you for all your help Misty and Natalie! You know I've had a pretty good writing week if there aren't many posts. Anywho, check out this video. It got me to a-wonderin'.



I loved this commercial when it came out back in the day, mainly for the Van Halen. Yet it was funny, too, and G.I. Joe completely out-cooled Ken.

But here's what I wondered. The Bad Boy. Do you prefer the Bad Boy(or Girl) Hero or the Good Guy(or girl) Hero? I'm split. I write both. I enjoy reading both if they're well rounded. But deep down I think if I was held over a pit of bubbling tar and told to choose, I would go with the good guy. But only if placed under some such duress. (Molten lava would get me to sing on this topic as well.)

So which type of hero would be your favorite as you dangle precariously over the pit? And, remember, this is for posterity, so be honest.

Why Can't Birthday Parties Be Easy?

Right now we are camping. I'm thrilled. Sorry, didn't mean to get that sarcasm all over you. That was just rude of me.

Each year I take one for Team Quinn and go camping for almost two weeks. So I'm leaving you with a rerun. And therefore, I won't be able to answer any comments until I get back. Yeah. THAT kind of camping.

Four days before we left for this trip I was hosting ten 7-year-olds outside in a torrential downpour for my youngest Urchin's birthday.

This rerun is from 2009, which NOT coincidentally appeared a few days before my Oldest Urchin's birthday. (There's a connection here. For some reason birthday parties can never run smoothly at Chez Quinn.) The day before this post I was mopping up vomit from the rest of the family and wrote that I felt like I had a bulls-eye on my back. Well, the next day...

Target Acquired

Yeah. It hit me last evening, before dinner. Only a day before my oldest daughter's birthday party. Can I say that I now have a new appreciation for vomiting in the wee hours since your stomach has had time to digest. I won't go into the degrees of chunkiness, just let it be known that I have changed my opinion.

So now I'm dealing with sore abdomen and back muscles from throwing up. When I was younger I believed it was important to stay in shape in case you had to hang from somewhere high up for a long period of time. Whether it be off a cliff, a high rise, high tension lines - what have you. Obviously you're up there due to an escape attempt from a psychopath and/or mercenaries.

Now that I'm old, I believe you need to stay in shape because you don't want sore muscles after a night of flu induced puking. So to that end I've put in an order for the Hawaii chair. Because really - who doesn't want to get fit while they sit?

Crystal Collier Soulless Cover Reveal

 The cheese-tastic Crystal Collier has done it again! Take a look at her little beauty that 's coming this October. 

 Have you met the Soulless and Passionate? In the world of 1770 where supernatural beings mix with humanity, Alexia is playing a deadly game.

SOULLESS, Book 2 in the Maiden of Time trilogy

Alexia manipulated time to save the man of her dreams, and lost her best friend to red-eyed wraiths. Still grieving, she struggles to reconcile her loss with what was gained: her impending marriage. But when her wedding is destroyed by the Soulless—who then steal the only protection her people have—she's forced to unleash her true power.

And risk losing everything.

What people are saying about this series: 

"With a completely unique plot that keeps you guessing and interested, it brings you close to the characters, sympathizing with them and understanding their trials and tribulations." --SC, Amazon reviewer

"It's clean, classy and supernaturally packed with suspense, longing, intrigue and magic." --Jill Jennings, TX

"SWOON." --Sherlyn, Mermaid with a Book Reviewer

Crystal Collier is a young adult author who pens dark fantasy, historical, and romance hybrids. She can be found practicing her brother-induced ninja skills while teaching children or madly typing about fantastic and impossible creatures. She has lived from coast to coast and now calls Florida home with her creative husband, three littles, and “friend" (a.k.a. the zombie locked in her closet). Secretly, she dreams of world domination and a bottomless supply of cheese. You can find her on her blog and Facebook, or follow her on Twitter.

COMING October 13, 2014

PREORDER your print copy

or 

Sign up for Crystal Collier's newsletter to receive release news and freebies.

Welcome To Club Earth

So The Man, the Urchins and I visited some beautiful local caverns recently. We, of course, hit the gift shop-- where we saw this display.

Didn't know there was a membership, though I should have suspected since I've been paying dues.

Apparently this club has an agenda.

And probably a manifesto. A long one.

So the Urchins and The Man are all home for the summer and there are many distractions.

I'm getting scary-obsessive with finishing my edits, and I'm finding things out about myself as I do. Not much of it good. (I never knew I was prone to wild mood swings and such violent thoughts.) Considering I'm all paid up with my Club Earth dues, here's hoping everyone survives.

So what are you doing this summer? Any crazy editing induced violence/craziness you'd like to share? I'm all ears. (said like Dolf in that Van Damme movie.)

'Tis The Season...

of reruns.

What, again?

Yes, again.

In the summer, when my Urchins are home and life speeds up even more, I have less time for a whole bunch of stuff. Especially blogging. So I usually compensate with a few reruns. I'm feeling a little guilty this year since April and the AtoZ challenge was nothing but reruns here at Tongue In Cheek.

Plus, I'm feeling the undeniable pull of my iso chamber. Every once in a while, the world becomes too overwhelming for my skewed, old fashioned brain, and I cocoon up like a pill bug and decide that society can go on without me for a while. I even have an entire category devoted to those times.

I'm a 33 1/3 rpm girl living in an mp3 world. Sigh.

So with that thought, here's an EXTREMELY early post from way back in 2008. It's actually the second post I ever wrote.

Hopefully soon I'll emerge from my self imposed isolation. Until then, enjoy...

Pop Culture is Passing Me By (and I don't really care)

I don't pay for TV. I'll give you a moment to recover from the shock before I go on. Nope. No cable. No Direct TV. No satellite. Do you need more time to mop up the beverage you were drinking? I get five channels pretty clearly, and one that looks like an avalanche.

Every once in a while I surf my five and a half channels to see what's on, and as I return to the first one again I think to myself, "Yep. Nothing's on." I figure I'm saving myself a lot of time. I've heard many a person after they've surfed their two hundred plus channels come to the same conclusion.

I grew up in a house where there was no cable TV. I watched some MTV at a friend's house back in the day, but that was about the extent of it. So it never was a real inconvenience for me to be without it later.

Do I feel deprived? No. Not really.

The only thing really coming out of it is that pop culture is passing me by. Show me a picture of Usher, and you'd have to tell me who he is. Same with George Strait, Jonas Brothers, any contestant from American Idol, Nick Lahey, actors from CSI or Law and Order, and most of the cast of Sex And the City. (I'd recognize Sarah Jessica Parker from Square Pegs.) I could go on, but you get the idea.

There are some people that are so ubiquitous that they even penetrate my little cocoon. Even though I'd rather they didn't. For example, I know who Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, Brittany Spears and Jessica Simpson are. And I have to say my life is no better for that knowledge. It may even be a little worse.

I've never seen an episode of Ghost Hunters, Rachel Ray or Sex and the City. Am I shocking you? Do you think I'm crazy? Could be, but as I live my life in ignorant bliss, just remember to speak slowly to me about anything dealing with pop culture. And ignore my confused stare.

I'll be okay. Honest.

Carol Kilgore Cover Turns Up the Heat!

 Get an eye full of this awesome book that's coming from Carol Kilgore.

Even better, check out what's happening on the inside! 

SECRETS OF HONOR
By the end of a long evening working as a special set of eyes for the presidential security detail, all Kat Marengo wants is to kick off her shoes and stash two not-really-stolen rings in a secure spot. Plus, maybe sleep with Dave Krizak. No, make that definitely sleep with Dave Krizak. The next morning, she wishes her new top priorities were so simple.
As an operative for a covert agency buried in the depths of the Department of Homeland Security, Kat is asked to participate in a matter of life or death—locate a kidnapped girl believed to be held in Corpus Christi, Texas. Since the person doing the asking is the wife of the president and the girl is the daughter of the first lady’s dearest friend, it’s hard to say no.
Kat and Dave quickly learn the real stakes are higher than they or the first lady believed and will require more than any of them bargained for.
The kicker? They have twenty-four hours to find the girl—or the matter of life or death will become more than a possibility.

BIO
Carol writes grocery lists, texts to her family, new lyrics to old songs for her dogs, love notes to her husband, and novels for herself. And for you. In between, she blogs weekly at Under the Tiki Hut and is active on Facebook and Twitter.
She sees mystery and subterfuge everywhere. And she’s a sucker for a good love story—especially ones with humor and mystery. Crime Fiction with a Kiss gives her the latitude to mix and match throughout the broad mystery and romance genres. Having flexibility makes her heart happy.



LINKS

You can connect with Carol and her books here:

Under the Tiki Hut blog:  http://www.underthetikihut.blogspot.com

Website with Monthly Contest: http://www.carolkilgore.net

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/carol.kilgore1

Twitter: http://twitter.com/carol_kilgore

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6094110.Carol_Kilgore

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Carol-Kilgore/e/B008FRCXQY

Do you guys know the awesome, Carol? Are you a fan of paying it forward? Have a book coming out soon? Lay it on me in the comments!!

I Won! I Won!!!

Hey everybody, I won an award! (Don't act so shocked, it's unbecoming.)

It's now June, and I told myself that I'd post my Liebster Award answers in May. I'm good, aren't I? I've got a million excuses as to why it didn't get done in May, but that's boring and this post is getting longer by the letter. See? Longer. (Get on with it! 10K imaginary bonus points to the first person to id that movie quote in the comments. Imaginary bonus points can be spent in my imaginary online store The Angry Villager.)

Anywho, I want to thank Marci Koski, whom I met during the insanely awesome and tiring AtoZ blogfest, (who is also insanely awesome and not tiring at all) for nominating me and only me (and several other people) for this prestigious award.

So here are The Rules (cue echoing effect)

1. Link back and thank the blogger who nominated you in your post. (check)
2. List 11 random facts about yourself.  (checkity check)
3. Answer the 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you. (Boom with a check)
4. Pick 5 – 10 new bloggers (must have less than 300 followers) to nominate. (half a check)
5. Ask them 11 new questions. Do not re-nominate the blogger who nominated you. (gotcha, no tag backs)
6. Go to each blogger’s site and inform them of their nomination. (I'm on it!)

11 Random Facts About Ava

1. My ophthalmologist tried to shiv my eye and then charged me over $100 for the terrifying experience.
2. Surprisingly, I'm not holding a grudge over random fact #1.
3. Okay, random fact #2 is, in fact, a lie.
4. I have an imaginary online store that caters to angry mobs.
5. I Heart Crappy Books (But possibly not for the reason you think)
6. I declared B.B. King to be a National Living Treasure.
7. I've owned three motorcycles in my life.
8. In college I worked in a Frederick's of Hollywood store as a sales clerk (and nothing else).
9. In high school I worked in a Fotomat booth. (Yes, I looked at all the pictures. What else was there to do?)
10. I have a Secret Talent.
11. In one of my story outlines, my heroine is abducted by aliens while wearing a sock monkey hat.

11 Questions for Marci's Nominees:

1. Why did you decide to start writing your blog? My hand was forced by author, Natalie J. Damshroder. I'd joined my local writers' group and had discussed the idea that a blog might be a good way to join in the social media revolution back in 2008. I set up the shell, and she immediately linked to it. The rest is history.
2. In one sentence, describe what your blog is about.  There’s a twist, though: don’t use any personal or possessive pronouns! (Muah ha haaaa!) Tongue In Cheek is a blog about the crazy shenanigans and going ons of Ava Quinn and anyone unfortunate enough to be in the splash zone of said person.
3. What is your earliest memory? I lived in a house full of antiques which were to be seen and not touched. When I was about three or four, I used to sneak into the dining room and twang the thin metal wick holder of a very rare candle making bench. The one pictured is missing the thin round metal rods that ran the length of each row of tubes where the wicks were tied. Probably because some kid wouldn't stop twanging them and broke them. I never broke ours, but it was a guilty pleasure from my childhood.
4. Do you dream?  If so, do you dream in color or black and white? Extraordinarily rarely, but when I do it's in black and white. Except on even rarer occasions when there is a splash of red a la The Sixth Sense.
5. If you could only make one journey during your lifetime, but it could be to anywhere in the world, where would you go?  Why? Man! Do I have to pick just one? A tour of Italy. Because of all the gorgeous Renaissance art and architecture. Not to mention the food.
6. What is one of your guilty pleasures (and this had better be good…I want something really embarrassing!)? I LURVE cheesy dubbed over kung fu movies from the sixties and seventies. Whenever I come across one on tv, I immediately throw the remote away and settle in for a Saturday afternoon of bad acting, ridiculous fake blood and all the crazy kung fu moves I can stomach. (Which is a lot more than you'd expect.)
7. Pick one:  the Harry Potter series or the Lord of the Rings trilogy.  Follow-up to what you picked:  books or movies? If I choose books, it's Harry Potter. If I choose movies, it's LOTR all the way, baby.
8. What is your favorite holiday, and if it’s NOT Halloween, why? Christmas. Because it's filled with wonder. Halloween is not my favorite because when I was a child I od'ed on candy corn and the holiday has left a bad taste in my mouth ever since. (Bwaa haa haa!!)
9. List three words that describe your personality. Skewed, loyal, generous
10. What is your favorite thing about how you earn a living? I get to teach, but I don't have to plan.
11. If you could live in any time period (past, present or future), when and where would you be? The 1990s, 'cause I'm basically still living in them with my prepay flip phone, non flat screen tv, videos and audio cassette tapes. Oh, and my vinyl.
 

And now, here are my nominees-

Author Delynn Royer-who happens to be my critique partner and friend. She writes historical fiction for the light of heart and has an outstanding book out right now. It Had To Be You. A romantic mystery set in NYC during the Roaring Twenties.

Author Vicki Smith who is in my local writer's group. A fun gal who I'm trying to make a newly converted fan of roller derby.

The awesome, talented and funny Liz Blocker, who has a great blog, and is also an author. (Are you seeing a trend?)

The award is yours, ladies, if you choose to accept it. This message will self destruct in five seconds.

11 Questions For Said Nominees 

1. What is the most unusual thing you've had a character in your stories do?
2. What is the craziest thing you've ever done in your life?
3. Using the ancient form of Haiku (17 syllables) describe your blog. (M.J. Fifield I put this one in just for you.)
4. What type of a vacation would be absolute torture for you?
5. Why did you start to write?
6. What is one thing on your bucket list that you haven't crossed off yet?
7. What is your favorite comfort food?
8. What charity or non profit is closest to your heart?
9. What movie had the best movie kiss ever?
10. Star Wars or Star Trek? Old or new?
11. Make up any question you want and answer it here.

So there's my Liebster Award post. Believe it or not it's been over a month in the making. I'd love to hear your answers to my questions in the comments. Don't forget to visit my imaginary store for all your angry mob needs!

Until next time, Citizens!