Friday, April 4, 2014

AtoZ Dangerous Demon Rhythms of the Polka

 Here on D-Day for the AtoZ Challenge, I have a very dangerous post. It's the post that led to the hostile take-over of this blog by an extremist Eastern European Pro-Polka faction back in 2012. This post, however, is from 2010. I strongly caution you to watch the attached videos at your own risk. Please contact me if you need a polka intervention due to the graphic and disturbing polka images.

The Dangers of the Polka

There was a tee shirt I found a year ago that I should have bought as a reminder of the dangers of polka. It read, "I cannot resist the demon rhythms of the polka." Now it just may be too late.

There should have been constant vigilance on my part to keep the polka demons at bay. But the overwhelming oomp pah pahs have forced their way into my family. I should have seen the signs, but being so far away, my parents slipped right under my radar.

It started out small. You know, easily dismissible signs. The quiet polka record playing in the background when I call. Dad wearing a loud shirt in a recent picture. Mom's vehement defense of the pairing of clarinet and tuba. Oh, I should have seen it sooner.

But now they're watching this tv program every night: WARNING - DO NOT WATCH THE ENTIRE PROGRAM. HIGH RISK OF POLKA INFECTION.



So now I'm going to have to have a polka intervention before something irreversible occurs. Something like this:



And that is just so wrong. I have to protect them from themselves - before it really gets out of hand. I can see where they're headed. The ultimate in vile polka.



OHH the inhumanity!!! I need to prepare a detox program stat. I'm sending liberal doses of easy listening. Gordon Lightfoot, Burt Bacharach, Lionel Richie. Anything to deaden the polka effect. Hopefully I'll be able to pull them back from the edge before they start buying matching lederhosen.

*bone wracking shudder*

21 comments:

Natasha Duncan-Drake said...

I never knew the polka could be so dangerous. Thank you so much for the warning! ;)
Tasha
Tasha's Thinkings

Andrea said...

I think I was already afraid of the accordion...perhaps with good reason?

Julie Flanders said...

omg so funny. At least you warned us though. I have only myself to blame now if I end up infected.

Lynda Dietz said...

I'm still laughing while trying to see through my tears to type. I had to show my husband this one, especially the Lawrence Welk clip.

We have been known to catch ourselves stopping on a polka station on Sunday mornings while driving to church, listening to such polka classics as "Sister Golden Hair." Yes, indeed. And we've noticed that while the musicians seem to have incredible skills, apparently vocal talent is optional. And yet somehow we can't change the station...

Sherry Ellis said...

Hahaha! I wasn't expecting the hair loss in the second video! Yep. Polkas are dangerous.

Lexa Cain said...

I worked in a hotel with a number of German and Austrian guests once, and I had a few songs that were polka-ish. That demon rhythm got them and they danced liked fiends! lol

Cheryl said...

Oh my. If I ever wanted to polka, I'm cured now. What a hair raising moment.


Hope you'll visit http://www.thebusymomsdaily.com/2014/04/blogging-from-to-z-april-challenge-d.html

M.J. Fifield said...

The demon rhythms of the polka call to me. Can't. Resist.

debi o'neille said...

I don't polka, but I do love to watch. Very entertaining. An art!
Deb@ http://debioneille.blogspot.com

Pat Hatt said...

Polkas are the demon spawn on the music world, you proved it

S.K. Anthony said...

LOL Polkas...the new danger!

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

I'm shivering either from dread or cold or the really bad coffee I'm drinking.

Sophie Duncan said...

oh the horrors of polka addiction! who knew?
Sophie
Sophie's Thoughts & Fumbles - A to Z Ghosts
Fantasy Boys XXX - A to Z Drabblerotic

Crystal Collier said...

LOL! Have I mentioned I'm a hobby ballroom dancer? I've bridged into polka a little bit, and I may already be subtly addicted. ;)

It Is Interesting To Note said...

Hilarious! The Lawrence Welk clip sent me over the edge. I had no idea the polka was such a dangerous activity!

Brandon Ax said...

The Polka infection, genius. I actually am fond of the music, but I now fear its power.

Brandon Ax: Writer's Storm

Liz Blocker said...

I need an intervention!! Help! I've almost lost- last vestiges of control-

Hmm, I feel better. I just have a strange urge to buy myself a very loud shirt...

Sarah Balding said...

I'm so afraid right now. Somebody hold me. The polka tunes are in my head, and I can't get them out!!

Debra said...

Too funny. Talk about letting your hair down. Here in Texas nobody would dare laugh aloud at polka though. That is what all the bad ass guys listen to as they cruise past in those cars with the drive by sound systems.

joss said...

Sat here chuckling away as I read this. I never knew very much about this polka you speak off. Now I am petrified and will avoid at all cost :)

Andi-Roo TheWorldForRealz said...

heehee --- The demon rhythm of the polka can't catch me! I will blast it with Britney Spears, Aerosmith, and the Beatles --- all staples from my eclectic play list. There's more where that came from! Don't make me pull out my big hair bands of the 80s CD!

I'm participating in AtoZ, too.
See you around!
~Andi-Roo
@TheWorld4Realz
TheWorld4Realz.com

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