Monday, April 21, 2014

AtoZ The 3 R's Writing, Rummaging and Ridiculousness

Helooooooo Atozers! So glad you've stopped by! I'm trying to keep up with answering comments and visiting anyone who stops in (as well as venturing out to others), but please know that this is an extremely hectic time of year for me, which is why I decided to participate for the first time by utilizing reruns. So If I don't get to you now, be assured I will get to you later to share the love and the good karma!

Today we have the three R's of Tongue In Cheek...

Writing Rummaging and Ridiculousness

So, okay, those are the 3 Rs here at Tongue In Cheek. They may not necessarily be your three.

Anywho, here we go.

Yeah, pretty much nonexistent right now. The oldest Urchin has started up again with what brought her down last fall. And of course, every crazy test the doctors could think of was done to her. So they're at a loss as to what else to try. They just say inane things like, "Stay the course" and "A thousand points of light" and get me so irritated that I switch around everything in their exam room while we're left alone waiting. Yeah, that's right, search for those tongue depressors. Search for them!

Ahem. Sorry.

I've also been sick for the past week, so my drive is not what it should be. Getting out of bed takes so much effort that opening and editing a wip is more than I can stand right now.

But, I'm leaving on Friday morning for the New Jersey Romance Writer's conference. If I ever look up the directions on how to get there, that is. I attended two years ago, and found it worthwhile. Even though the fire alarm went off in the middle of the night at the hotel. So hopefully going to the conference will get some of my writing mojo to return.

I am a rummage sale junkie. I love a good rummage sale like stink bugs love my underwear drawer.

Whilst arriving early to a particularly good one late in the summer, I eyed the crowd. They were a feisty looking bunch. Frazzled moms with fidgety children, little blue-haired old ladies with huge shopping bags made of recycled plastic (you know, the ones with the sharp, pointy corners), unkempt, overweight, sweat pant wearing men with stringy comb overs.

Yes they were a well seasoned, yet motley crew of hard core rummage maniacs. This is the kind of crowd where the little old ladies will run you over with their wire baskets-on-wheels as soon as look at you. The unkempt men will use every available body odor in their human stink arsenal to clear a section they want. And the mommies will sic their little mucus encrusted darlings on your ass before you can say viscous liquids.

Hard. Core.

All they needed were some eye patches, peg legs and a touch of scurvy, and they'd be the masters of the Seven Seas.

So as I walked down the sidewalk, eyeing the line of competition, and receiving the hairy eyeball in return, I busted out my best professional wrestling announcer voice and yelled, "Let's get ready to RUUUUUMMMAAAAAAAGGE!!!!"

Everyone gave me a lot of room after that, leaving me to browse sections at my leisure. (I owe all my psychological warfare tactics to the sea monkeys.)

No, that last section wasn't the ridiculousness. Sheesh. This will be some random ridiculousness.

I found a dead, dried out, cracking apart stink bug.
In my underwear drawer. EEEEEEEEWWWWW! All right, that was more like the "What's Grosser Than Gross" jokes that permeated the early eighties. (You all remember those, right? What's grosser than gross? Finding out your brother's scab collection is missing after eating a bowl of Cornflakes.)

My Reign as the county 'Possum Queen is soon coming to an end, and I'll need to attend the Moonshine and Fried Possum Carnival in the first weekend of November to hand over my crown of taxidermied 'possums with rhinestone accents to the next queen. Ahh, the memories I'll be taking with me after this year of excitement. If you haven't accompanied me on the journey and missed it, check out the 'Possum Queen category to the right and catch up on all the 'possumy goodness this year has wrought.

So I'm off to get my annual haircut today for the writer's conference. My hair is ridiculously long. It reaches my waist. Time to get a few inches off.

So tell me. How are your writing, rummaging and ridiculousness going?


randi lee said...

Hey Ava! Sorry to hear about your being sick. That writer's conference sounds awesome. I hope you have a great time!! Don't worry about not responding to comments--I've pretty much given up on trying to keep pace with them for the month of April, myself!

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

I haven't heard the word 'rummage' since I first read this post. My mom always called yard sales rummage sales. LOL

Cheryl said...

Sorry you've been sick. Hope you're feeling better in time for the conference. I love attending writers conferences.

No writing going on for me right this minute, but hopefully that will change later in the week.

Thanks for the chuckle about your rummage sale experience and that stink bug.

Crystal Collier said...

Stink bug in the drawer...better than a roach I supposed. We've had to hire a service to keep the bugs off our property, and man am I glad we did. It definitely makes for a happier/cleaner environment.

True Heroes from A to Z

Stephanie Faris said...

I think it's so tough for moms to carve out writing time. Seems someone is always needing something. But ewwww to the stink bug! Although a roach probably would have been worse. Roaches seriously creep me out. (Does that mean roaches are grosser than stink bugs? LOL.)

debi o'neille said...

I hope your health improves, and I'm with you on letting them search like crazy for those tongue depressors. I hate waiting in those little sterile rooms.

I hope you enjoy the romance conference. I'm sure will be fun.

Chrys Fey said...

I'm sorry you've been sick. And I'm very sorry that your doesn't isn't well. But I couldn't help but laugh while picturing you rearranging and hiding the supplies in the exam rooms. I hope you both feel better!

Liz Blocker said...

I don't know how you do it, Ava, but every time you post something serious, you follow it up with something so cracked out and funny and I'm laughing even though I'm telling myself not to. I hope your daughter is OK - and that you feel better soon - and yes, ALL of that was ridiculous and AWESOME :)

Sylvia Ney said...

So glad to find this fun blog! New follower here. I'm stopping by from the "A to Z" challenge, and I look forward to visiting again.


Lexa Cain said...

I can picture the people at the rummage sale perfectly! I'm hoping you and your daughter get better soon, and I hope you have a great time at the conference. :)

Mina Burrows said...

I don''t even want to talk about the writing.

The rummaging...well, I've been trashing things lately because I can't stand clutter lately.

Being ridiculous is a state of mind for me. Pull up a the entire afternoon?

D Biswas said...

Hi Ava, I love the word 'rummage' -- have to edit it out of all my manuscripts :)

Natasha Duncan-Drake said...

We call rummage sales, jumble sales round here and I totally recognise the reports of little old ladies that will run you down as soon as look at you :). It's been years since I've been to a good jumble, these days everyone seems to be into boot fairs instead.
Tasha's Thinkings - AtoZ (Vampires)
FB3X - AtoZ (Erotic Drabbles)

Share This

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...